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Afraid of the ball:
what helps

By Gabe Ramos · U.S. Soccer Coach Educator · Updated November 2026

Flinching, turning away, running from the ball. Plenty of children are scared of getting hit, and telling them not to be does not help. Here is what does.

The one thing to remember

Confidence comes from lots of gentle touches, not from being told to be brave.

Why it happens

  • They got hit once, and they remember it.
  • The ball is too big or too heavy. A size 4 ball on a 4v4 field is a common mistake.
  • A bigger child kicks it hard.
  • They are simply cautious. Some children are.

What helps at home

  • Roll the ball softly, and let them stop it with their foot.
  • Try a softer ball or a slightly deflated one.
  • Let them kick it at you, as hard as they like.
  • Play in small spaces, close together, so nothing comes in fast.
  • Keep it short, and stop while it is still fun.

What helps at practice

Coaches can help by giving every child a ball. A child with a ball at their feet is in control, and that builds confidence fast. Dribbling games are better for a nervous child than lines of shooting. If kids are shooting, make sure a nervous child is not in the way, and do not put them in goal unless they ask.

What not to say

  • “It doesn’t hurt.” It might.
  • “Don’t be scared.” It tells them they are doing something wrong.
  • “Everyone else is doing it.”
  • Anything that makes fun of them, even kindly.

What to say instead

Try saying“That one was fast, wasn’t it?”
“You stopped it with your foot. Nice.”
“We can go slower.”

Give it time

Fear of the ball usually fades as a child gets more touches and more control. Most of the time it happens without anyone noticing. Keep it fun, and celebrate small steps. Staying in the game is the win.

Questions parents and coaches ask

Should I make my child play goalkeeper to get over it?

No. Being forced into goal usually makes it worse.

At what age does this go away?

It varies a lot. With plenty of gentle touches, most children become more comfortable over a season or two.

My child got hit in the face and now won’t play. What do I do?

Give it a little time, and start again with gentle play at home. If it was a hard hit, make sure they are OK first.

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